


Forgiveness

by Ithildin



Series: Blood Ties [4]
Category: Forever Knight
Genre: Belonging, F/M, Love, Regret, Vampire Family, Vampire Sex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2006-09-05
Updated: 2006-09-05
Packaged: 2018-08-13 05:57:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,156
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7965127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ithildin/pseuds/Ithildin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This is from 2006, and I realized it got missed when I started archiving the earlier stories in the series here on AO3.</p><p> </p><p>  <i>Upon reading over stories in the series, I realized that the aftermath of LaCroix's</i><br/>failed attempt to bring Triona across had been done only in flashback form. I'd never actually written anything specifically dealing with it as a story unto itself. Well, now I have! I'm doing this a little<br/>differently, envisioning a set of vignettes bound together with one theme. This is the first one.</p>
    </blockquote>





	Forgiveness

**Author's Note:**

> This is from 2006, and I realized it got missed when I started archiving the earlier stories in the series here on AO3.
> 
>  
> 
> _Upon reading over stories in the series, I realized that the aftermath of LaCroix's_  
>  failed attempt to bring Triona across had been done only in flashback form. I'd never actually written anything specifically dealing with it as a story unto itself. Well, now I have! I'm doing this a little  
> differently, envisioning a set of vignettes bound together with one theme. This is the first one.

Sleep would come easily to no one  
this night. Too much emotion and far too many regrets eddied in the  
dark - feelings so strong as to be an almost physical sensation -- to  
make that possible. But as useless as it was to try, it was also an  
excuse, and an escape, from what needed to be said and for what needed  
to be asked....  
  


* * *

  
' Forgiveness '  
  
Triona lay still in her bed, trying  
to still her thoughts, her feelings. She had accepted the consequences  
of her choice to have LaCroix bring her across, but she had never  
envisioned what those consequences would truly be when everything had  
gone so horribly wrong. This morning, when she had walked into the sun,  
and had started to burn, the harsh reality of what the years ahead held  
for her became clear with a brutal finality. A memory of a voice,  
something she thought she had imagined when she had been in that place  
between life and death, came to her; "...the path you have chosen will  
not be what you envision. Only the twilight awaits you, an eternity of  
neither dark nor light."  
  
She laughed in the darkness, a harsh,  
almost hysterical sound. Triona was no longer able to hold back the  
wave of emotion she'd been trying so hard to contain. Instinctively she  
felt for LaCroix, his presence always reassuring to her no matter his  
mood. Triona didn't want to be alone, couldn't be alone anymore in the  
dark -- a dark more of the soul than one of the night.  
  
Now, as her mind sought his, she felt  
an almost intangible wisp of what she could only describe as sadness  
and regret, and maybe even a vestige of the same loneliness that she  
had felt overwhelming her. Then it was gone, like a mist blown away by  
the night breeze.  
  
Rolling out of her bed, she pulled on  
her robe and made her way down the hall and up the stairs to the top  
floor where LaCroix's suite was. Not bothering to knock, she gently  
pushed open the door.    
  


* * *

  
  
LaCroix stood looking out the window  
into the night. He felt her there behind him, the fear and grief he had  
felt earlier from her now coalescing into the need for reassurance.  
What she felt tore at him as surely as if he were feeling it himself.  
Even more so, because LaCroix knew he was the reason she suffered.  
  
As she remained in the doorway,  
silent, LaCroix turned to her. She seemed somewhere very far away. He  
sighed. If only...  but no. It was too late for those regrets, and  
unworthy of her loyalty and love.  
  
She startled him, suddenly speaking  
into the silence of the night. "I'm sorry. I would have done anything  
to be with you truly. Not this pale reflection of what you envisioned  
for me, for us." Her lips curled in a grimace. "But now, I can never be  
anything but an accident, a freak of nature," she finished bitterly.  
  
LaCroix was stunned. How could she  
have known his half-formed thought? The depth of her insight unsettled  
him. He never wanted her to feel as if this was in any way her failure.  
That she had, even in the slightest, disappointed him.  
  
She was now standing next to him. "I  
wish I could have been what you wanted," she whispered. "That I could  
have been part of your true family."  
  
LaCroix grabbed her shoulders hard  
enough to make her wince. "True family? How can you even say that?" he  
asked fiercely. "Do you think I value you any less because you aren't a  
vampire? You are still mine, as surely as Nicholas or Janette."  
  
Triona shook her head, "I mean as  
much as they do? As much as Nicholas?" Her mood suddenly shifted, going  
from sadness to anger. "Is that why you have been here in your suite,  
avoiding the sight of me? Don't I at least deserve the truth of how  
much of a disappointment I am to you?" The last was practically  
shouted.  
  
She was breathing hard, and he could  
feel her anger beating down on him, an anger that called his. LaCroix  
wrapped his hand in her hair, pulling her head back sharply, exposing  
her throat. So, she doubted her place in the family? Then it was time  
he reminded her of it. He ran his fangs down her throat, growling  
softly. As his face brushed hers, he felt the cool dampness of tears.  
Triona's body went limp in his grasp, her anger abruptly dissipating.  
LaCroix's anger fled as quickly as hers had. "Oh, my dearest child," he  
sighed against her throat, "some things never change."  
  
He kissed the soft skin between her  
ear and jaw, as her breathing quieted. "It has been too long since we  
truly shared ourselves. It's time we remedied that."  
  
Triona's hands went up around his  
shoulders as LaCroix ran the tips of his fangs down her throat. She  
shuddered a little as they slowly pierced her skin. Gathering her in  
his arms, still slowly sipping from her, he carried her to the large  
leather covered chair that sat in front of the fireplace. Gathering her  
closer, he sat, continuing to drink. This would be a true melding, with  
no overriding passion to muddy the joining. It was important that she  
knew fully his regard and love for her, as he wanted in turn to know  
the depths of her soul and heart. He sipped, ever so slowly, drawing  
each drop of her blood, savoring it, and cherishing her and all she was  
and ever would be.  
  
She sighed a little, her hands  
relaxing their grip on his shoulders, then sliding down his chest as  
she lost all control of her body. This was a rare joining; their usual  
encounters ones of fiery emotions. He felt her anguish, believing she  
had disappointed him, and that Methos would never truly forgive her for  
the choice she’d made. Fear that she would lose them both, and  
herself.  And there was also a deep-seated bitterness, realizing  
she was trapped forever between two worlds, never fully belonging in  
either.  
  
LaCroix let her see to the depths of  
his soul. He truly did not regret that she wasn't a vampire. His only  
regret was at being the instrument of her pain. If he had not tried to  
bring her across, if he had listened to Methos’ warnings, she would be  
whole -- not torn and vulnerable to both other Immortals and the sun.  
He bore sole culpability for that, and would take responsibility for  
her well being for all time in repayment.  
  
He tasted her tears as they rolled  
down her throat, mingling with her blood, feeling the full measure of  
her forgiveness, and her love. LaCroix withdrew his fangs from her  
throat, moving his lips to hers to kiss her gently. Triona sighed  
softly, before finally drifting into the embrace of healing sleep.  
  


* * *


End file.
